28 March 2006

Top Ten Water Odour Excuses

By now, it should be common knowledge that the water in Klang Valley is supposed to be safe. Yeah, it doesn't smell right, but you don't really have a choice, you know. Maybe if you make coffee with it, you won't smell it anymore. Or you buy mineral water loh ....

Anyways, I remain unconvinced. I'm installing water filters at my place just in case. Something in the water is causing the odour, and unless I'm really convinced that something in there is no dangerous, it's a big ask for me to trust that water.

I just hope they would clarify what that odour really is instead of pointing fingers in every known direction and stating what's NOT in the water. I'm dying to know what's IN the water.

Anyways, just for laughs, I'm made up the Top Ten Water Odour Excuses list ..

  • To prevent corrosion at the water pipes, we coated them with M&M’s. It's cheaper.
  • Water Filter guy can't get to work lately because oil price increase made it impossibly expensive to drive to work. And there's no buses where the water plant it.
  • “Wait a minute – you mean we're supposed to filter off that smell? Hold a sec ... ” **Frantically makes call to water processing plant ...**
  • You have to upgrade to the XP version with SP2 …ooops … that’s for Moz’s laptop problems instead.

  • “It’s really nothing. We just decided to put some funny smell into the water so that those guys who put tap water into mineral water bottles and try and sell them to you can’t do that no more.”
  • You’re supposed to spray perfume in the water if you want it to smell good.
  • It's just the smell of the good bacteria that we've put in there. You know, like, the good bacteria in Vitagen?
  • We regret to inform you that you’ll only get the odour-less version once we increase the water tariff by 20%. But, hey, but our water is still the cheapest in the region.
  • We’re really sorry for the odour problem. We recently discovered that Bigfoot had been taking showers at our water processing facilities.
  • It’s the runoff from those chemical laced water canons they shot at the demonstrators at those oil price hike demonstrations. The water’s safe. Really.


angel said...

my H2O is smell-less ah...

if got smell, can i come to your place to take H2O? :D

moz monster said...

angel: boleh ... i only charge the normal market mineral water price ... =)

angel said...

*smacks you HARD*



moz monster said...

angel: *Includes medical insurance premium into price of water*

Yeah, charge.