26 March 2006

Top Ten Signs You're On A Bad Holiday

Alright, I know ... it's that time of the year ... MAS travel fair not too long ago, MATTA fair about now (I think), so there are plenty of people who have bought holiday packages and are now raring to go.

After all, it's really necessary to go for holidays now in today's pressure cooker world. If I don't have a job that requires all this travelling, I would be taking 200 days off every year. Really.

But how many of us come back from our travel to faraway land happy all the time? Not all. There's definately an element of luck to our holidays. Sometimes it's just not meant to be. Sometimes it's the little things like the food on a particular day, or an a**hole guide leaving you stranded in the middle of nowhere. Sometimes it's more disasterous - you loose your baggage or you arrived in a beach resort only to find it's hurricane season.

Well, the Moz Monster public service top ten series continues with the Top Ten Signs You're On A Bad Holiday ...

  • "Oh, we ran out of taxis and vans, so that's why we're taking you to the hotel in an ambulance"
  • Your homestay program was with a wanted JI fugutive running away from the authorities.
  • "What do you mean Bali? You're not in Bali sir, this is Guantanamo Bay ... "
  • The luxurious picnic you were promised turned out to be a McDonald's Happy Meal and a pack of Cheezels.
  • Before the start of your city tour, you have to wear your bullet proof vest, and fill up a responsibility waiver form.
  • When you ask the hotel to bring you some hot water, the room service guy turns up with a kettle, a stack of old newspaper and a magnifying glass.
  • "Yeah, this was a national park 20 years ago. Then they turned it into the world's largest open air landfill - we now dump everything here. Say ... you didn't drive for 3 days and 2 nights just to get HERE, did ya ?"
  • The travel agency didn't tell you that the budget airline you were taking had no landing rights at your destination, which meant that you have to jump off the plane on a parachute.
  • The "infinity pool" mentioned in the hotel brochure is really the fountain in the shopping center next door.
  • Your tour guide turns in a Catwoman costume, whips you everytime you try to stray off the tour route and insists you call her Mistress.
And there you have it ... the signs that you're on a holiday gone wrong =)


Che-Cheh said...

I must be lucky so far. The first one about ambulance is hilarious...LOL

moz monster said...

che-cheh: Most people don't ever get into the situations mentioned. However, I did have a friend who ended up in Bengkok, Indonesia (find it on Google) rather than Bangkok, Thailand. No kidding - do look up Google - you should find it on Java.

Che-Cheh said...

Surely there were documents and plane ticket mentioning Bengkok instead of Bangkok....and your fren didn't realised ?

moz monster said...

che-cheh: I have no idea. I just know that we laughed about it everytime we see him, still ... Bengkok, Indonesia .... muahahahahaks!!!

david said...

ha! I've had a few bad holidays in the past but never including any of your list thank god! I would expect a hell of a lot of Holiday Compensation if any of them did happen to me.