03 April 2006

Eternal Sunshine of an Optimistic Mind ...

Q: What do you call a weekend spent at home doing NOTHING?
A: Bliss

My weekend was an empty sheet of paper, if you get the drift. I wanted to do NOTHING. And so I steeled my resolve, and switched off the mobile.

The result? A weekend of nothing but time to myself. Which is a good thing where I come from. Really. I kid you not.

Lately, the world around me had not been kind to me. Some people had bad things happen to them. I had my own little round of difficulty at work. And my busy-ness had prevented me from accepting the situation.

The long road to acceptance, more so when you're dealt with a cruel blow of fate, is sometimes long and bitter. I think there's a process - another word for a long drawn cycle in nature - that has to take place before one accepts reality.

I've always realised I wouldn't take it easy. I went through my own hell, and confronted my little demons. I was angry, I denied it for a while ... but ultimately, it's real. There's no running away from it. Now, I'm ok.

I took time to reflect on my own because being occupied with work and other worldly realities, there's really not much thought cycle I get to put into my own life. My personal situation.

It's ironic - I work so hard so that I get some $$$ to hopefully get the things I want in life. But I work so hard I think I'm not smelling the roses along the way.

Sometimes, I think we have to readjust our thoughts and actions so that they fall in line with the bigger picture. I attempted that over the weekend, and while not completely successful, I feel I've come to terms with my situation.

I feel so much better now that I've come to accept my situation. It'll be ok. Nothing cannot be overcomed. Nothing really stop us from going out to do our thing every day.

I thank the people who've sent me wishes and support. I guess for a person with as little friends as me, I can take heart that I have a lot of people whom I can count on for support.

I hope I'll be optimistic in the days, weeks, months and years to come. The best thing I can do is to live a little better.

I would like to dedicate this blog to 'someone'. You'll live on forever in my thoughts. Everyday that passes by is one day closer to us meeting again. I have no fancy way to say goodbye ... just glad I had my time with you.

Remember your promise to me - put on a sunset for me everytime you think of me. I'll hold you to that.

Yesterday evening, as I was taking a short walk near home, I saw the most outrageously gorgeous sunset peeking out from the gloomy skies. Hi. Nice to see you again =)


pelf said...

*scratches head*

moz monster said...

pelf: Don't have to understand. It's a rant. It's just me being myself. But I'm happy to say I'm feeling very good now.

Che-Cheh said...

Don't realy understand...hahaha
Just that I also love doing nothing in the weekend. That is really bliss!

moz monster said...

che-cheh: Yes, just enjoy the nothing you get to do on your weekends.