05 June 2006

Top Ten Ways The Higher Petrol Price Is Impacting ..

It's been a while since I've done a Top Ten thingy. Not much time with the new job bearing down on me, and with some other things happening in my own life as well. But since we're at it, why not ??

It's been a few months now since the gahmen decided it's a good idea to do away with some petrol subsidy, and since then, while the gahmen is acting like all is fine and dandy, we the rakyat faces the crunch. I haven't seen any real action with regards to improving public transportation - I'm a little embarrased to think I actually thought they would really do that in the first place. Heck, as long as our ministers gets police escorts that cut through all the traffic congestion, like, hell no - they're not going feel the pain we do.

Anyways, if you really ask me ... here's how The Higher Petrol Price Is Impacting ...

  • Pizza Hut will now only deliver to places they can walk to. And they can't guarantee the pizza won't be all cold and soggy when you get it.
  • Girls who stay 10km or further have turned me down - I'm now too expensive to date.
  • My mamak sessions lately have been conducted by video conferencing to save costs.
  • The delivery charges have actually become more expensive than the flowers I'm sending. So I've stopped secretly admiring anyone anymore.
  • Girls no longer dig guys in IT line. Or any other line, for that matter. Girls now dig guys who run petrol stations. =(
  • The fancy restaurants had stopped accepting credit cards, and will now accept either cash, or petrol.
  • Houses built more than 10 minutes from petrol stations can't sell - they're too expensive to live in !
  • Suddenly, your parents are ashamed of you at family gatherings because you don't have a job in the Oil & Gas sector.
  • It really hurts you lots when you realise that the petrol pump attendant is probably going to get more bonus than you this year !!
  • In the not so distant future, it will be romantic to give your girlfriend a truckload of petrol for Valentine's Day.
And since I'm all fueled up with nowhere to go, here's a couple more ...
  • The F1 cars would all be running on electric engines starting from next season.
  • The PM's convoy will be converted from all Perdana's and Benz's to bullock carts and bicycles soon.
  • All the besi buruk thieves are now turning into siphon petrol thieves.
  • Disney is modifying it's "Cars" animated movie to show cars drinking Cappucino and Mocha from Starbucks instead of petrol.
  • The next time a tai kor comes and asks for protection fee, you have the option of paying in the form of petrol as well.
  • Whenever you get pulled over by the traffic cops, they will now ask for duit Petronas instead of duit Starbucks.


Inevitable said...

I got one I got one...

Pay dowry in the form of petrol.

Anonymous said...

What a fucking lame post....

Inevitable said...

This anon must be the same barger that commented at my site...

moz monster said...

inevitable: Bummer ... some sad people have very little to look forward in life except to write stupid comments. All said and done, I'm feeling sad because this bugger's mum probably didn't teach him that if he's got nothing nice to say, he should just SHUT UP.

BTW, i hope you won't have to pay your dowry in petrol ... =P

Che-Cheh said...

I can now ride bicycle to work and people will understand me and not think I'm nuts. kekekeke

angel said...

Anonymous, where are your balls? If u dare to liu people, liu lah properly! What a liuliu!!



LOL @ duit Petronas! :P

BTW, dun die yet, okays?

moz monster said...

angel: Wah ... my own supporter come liao !!

No, No ... not die yet ... I really meant to say I thought I died and went to heaven !!